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August 22, 2005
The REAL Gospel...it's not what you thought.
Nope...it's not that Jesus loves you, or that you can be saved from Hell, or even all that garbage about loving your enemy.
No, the true Gospel is that Fundies don't use the New King James Version.
Why else would the nice folks at Parkwood Baptist Church just outside of Greenville, SC think it was important enough to annouce to the world? (Notice the Center Justify formatting....that kind of attention to detail means it must be true.)
click for larger view
Now, since there isn't a comma following the word "Fundamentalists" we must assume that the sentence is simply a conveyance of information, and not a directive. (Although the lack of an apostrophe in the word "dont" could indicate that they simply didn't order any of the interchangeable comma/apostrophe tiles.)
Hence, the intended reader must not be a Fundamentalist himself, but rather a random passerby who has not yet learned how to identify this strange species of Christian.
So, being the kind and generous souls that they are, this "Distinctly Different Southern Baptist Church" lets us know exactly what to expect from them...what is truly important.
| By sboatright | 08:24 PM
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Comments
i've thought often that it would be too cool to do a coffee table book of church signs.
-rebecca
Posted by: rebecca at August 25, 2005 01:24 PM